Thursday 31 October 2013

Goodbye Night

Goodbye night
night adieu
adieu darkness
light is new

So long care
care dissolve
dissolve worry
emerge resolve

To walk away
away from the past
past leaving chains
chains never last

Journey alone
alone I travel
travel so far
far from the gavel

That passed sentence
sentence on me
me, I will go
go where I'm free

Light on my face
face to the wind
wind from the east
east to the friend

Friend, myself
myself, eternal
eternal the dawn
dawn not external

But internal
ever eternal
Me.

7 comments:

  1. Oh you handled this format better than I. I love the flow when reading it, but really hating using it to shape my words. Very confining. Well done. X

    http://shahscribbles.wordpress.com

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  2. "ever eternal me"! very very nice.. loved the format..It was a treat to read!

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  3. A brilliant use of the loop form. I shied away from that idea but I think I must try it, now I've seen yours.

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  4. As others have said, fantastic loop form! I'm impressed, and this is a lovely poem. Now I wish I'd done the loop!

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  5. Thanks everyone. I am pleased you liked it.

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  6. So glad to see another loop poem! Your is lovely - extended across such short lines it has a great motion to it, while still be reflective.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. I find I am growing fond of this one as well.

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