Personal Apocalypse

Your wife kicks you out
and then he moves in.
You gather your stuff,
she said you beat her.
Now he has your tools
and your new truck.

And you can't get it back.

Your brain blows a fuse.
You can't make it work.
Thoughts run amok.
You find a replacement
it matches the amperes.
but things aren't the same.

And you can't get it back.

Your kid starts on drugs
and you hear that she's hooking.
You stop going downtown.
You want your old life.

But you can't get it back.

The booze makes it easy,
bourbon and scotch, then
vodka and pills. The job
it goes south and you
line up for pogy.
When it runs out
you line up for welfare.

You wish you could function,
but you can't.

And you meet someone
who gives you a chance.
Says come on with me,
and you pour out your story
to a room full of people/.
They all nod like they know you.

You'll give it a chance.

She says she likes you
and why not move in?
Her brother can give you a job.
Coffee smell in the morning,
the sun through a shade.
She calls you her darling.

You're glad you never gave up
on this life that you've made.

The Rapture

The moon turned to blood

and the stars disappeared;

they fell from the sky

after the floods,

and the food is too dear.

Then came the flies.

Parliament stood

and then shut down for a year.

The looters must die,

and where are the good?

Do you remember them here?

Did they leave without saying goodbye?

We once stood where they stood.

We feared what they feared.

But we laughed when they cried.

We forgot what we should

have remembered. 

Undone

I said,
I'm tired of being angry
all of the time.
I have been angry
for my whole life.

She said,
That's a good idea for
you could use some
focus and direction,
some self control.

I said,
If I lose my temper
(as in forsaking it)
and my raging thoughts,
I don't know who I'll become.

She said,
You should try it for fun.
You will undo a lot
and become most definitely
undone,
a universe dispelled, forgotten.

I said,
Maybe that's why I hang on.
There's always a foe if you look hard enough.

She said,
It's time to look for a friend.

Small

Small
bird on a branch

Small
Snail on a leaf

Flesh head slime
Shell and tentacles

Small
Inside a big body
The lost boy of my youth
His dreams float elsewhere
Lost long ago

Time
To reach those balloons
That came to rest in a field
Far far away.
It will be the last thing
He'll ever do.

Transmordial

I am transmordial!
You know what I mean.
Not from the beginning,
but from outside.
That is why I cannot,
will not,
accept things as they are

For instance I know
you will not flush shit
down the toilet
one day, but instead
will cultivate it into
nutrition and enzymes
to grow your own food.
And a man will boast
of the quality of his turd.
And that he eats for his waste
to be useful and pure.


I am transmordial!
You know what I mean.
Not from the beginning,
but from outside.
That is why I cannot,
will not,
accept things as they are

And you and I are
genetically
modified,
along with our food.
We all have a wing.
The lucky have two,
and a scorpion tail
and the Greatest
UFC matches;
temporary
paralysis
producing
the winners.

I am transmordial!
You know what I mean.
Not from the beginning,
but from outside.
That is why I cannot,
will not,
accept things as they are

And you cannot
think a thought
without someone knowing.
Murderers are caught
before malice is showing.
The world is quite peaceful
in a strained sort of way but
if you can't put a foot right,
run run away!

I am transmordial!
You know what I mean.
Not from the beginning,
but from outside.
That is why I cannot,
will not,
accept things as they are.

Fifty trillion cells
and you think it's all you.
There are more life forms
in blood than
you can imagine,
more purposes included
in running your body
as in running your planet;
you run the gamut
of investigation
in vain.

I am transmordial!
You know what I mean.
Not from the beginning,
but from outside.
That is why I cannot,
will not,
accept things as they are.

Harness intention.
Find the harmony that's you.
It's all you can do.
For you are an essence
from beyond this place
that you know.
You came to bestow
a purpose,
to find the power
of a mind;
to discern and choose
and prove
what is best. To
become transmordial
like me.

In the Moment

In the moment,

I don't exist.

Neither do you.

C'mon now!

Admit it!

If you ever get there,

to the place

of no beginning

and no grand finale,

you're not there

and neither am I.

There is nothing!

Nothing fucking exists

unless there is motion;

a beginning, middle and end.

Without that, we're done.

Family Court

It's family court today, how do
I feel? It's better not feeling my
own blood rising and falling with motions.
Yes, rather let my mind dictate a high
sonority, a stature bellowing,
composure. A judge, lawyer , father (no
child) but the mother (my daughter), and her mother,
my wife, in this pot, no DNA that
is common to me. Adoption, marriage
and a child forced in, has joined me to this
house of all nations; eastern Europe to
a tropical island.Estranged am I from
the tall trees and streams of my home town;
my dad, my mom, my sister and brother.
I have become a stranger to myself.